THE WHITE HOUSE MID-WEEK MESSENGER
(a ministry of)
White House General Baptist Church
P.O Box 1485, White House, TN 37188
(4012 Highway 31W - Phone 672-3530)
Pastor: Larry Treadway - phone: 672-9661 (cell – 210-5735)
MAY 15, 2013
“Just Thinking”
Weekly Devotion for May 15, 2013
Casting down imaginations, and every high thing that exalteth itself against the knowledge of God, and bringing into captivity every thought to the obedience of Christ; (2 Cor. 10:5)
Henry Ford once said, “Thinking is the hardest work there is, which is the probable reason why so few engage in it.” I’m sure he had in mind productive thinking.
Are your thoughts productive thoughts?
Another quote by unknown source is, “A penny for your thoughts.” Another followed up with the statement, “You’d probably get change back.” What is your thoughts worth?
Our thoughts come from our heart. The first time I heard the statement made, “Garbage in, garbage out.” It was a teenager in a church I attended years ago. No wonder, the Bible states in Proverbs 23:7, “For as he thinketh in his heart, so is he.”
What are you thinking? What books are you reading presently? What are you watching? What are your thoughts about life?
And the peace of God, which passeth all understanding, shall keep your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus. Finally, brethren, whatsoever things are true, whatsoever things are honest, whatsoever things are just, whatsoever things are pure, whatsoever things are lovely, whatsoever things are of good report; if there be any virtue, and if there be any praise, think on these things. (Phil. 7:7-8). Think about that!
Bro. Larry
SUNDAY NEWS
It was a pleasure on Sunday to baptize Dylan as well as hear the comments about Mothers. Even though there was no Sunday evening service, we may have had the largest attendance to our 5 p.m. small group discussions. Of course, we had food!
There is a busy weekend coming up at WHGBC. I hope you will be a part.
THIS WEEK’S CHURCH CALENDAR
Wednesday
* Adult Study @ 7 p.m.
* Children & Youth Class @ 7 p.m.
Saturday
* Men’s Breakfast @ 8 a.m.
* Women’s Work Day (men invited) @ 9 a.m.
Church Reserved in the afternoon
The Scott family for Briana Scott
Saturday, May 18th @
Everyone is invited for the graduation party from 5-7 p.m.
at White House General Baptist Church
Sunday
* Prayer Time @ 9:30 a.m.
* Sunday School @ 10 a.m.
* Worship @ 11 a.m.
Graduate’s Sunday – Honoring our Graduates
* Children’s Church @ 11:15 a.m.
* Core Ministries Meeting @ 4 p.m.
* The Story Small Group Discussions @ 5 p.m.
* Evening Service @ 6 p.m.
* Youth Meeting @ 6 p.m.
NEWS WITH A CHRISTIAN PERSPECTIS
PHOENIX (BP) -- Two new undercover videos by the pro-life group Live Action reveal details of late-terms abortions that rarely are discussed publicly -- such as the tearing apart of an unborn baby at 23 weeks limb by limb to avoid a live birth or the killing of a baby at 26 weeks with a needle injection to stop its beating heart.
The gruesome details of the death of babies still in the womb are part of Live Action's undercover investigation of clinics that perform late-term abortions. As part of the investigation, pregnant women wearing hidden cameras and microphones go inside the clinics and ask about obtaining an abortion, although they have no intention of getting. The video link is ;
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TEHRAN (BP) -- Saeed Abedini, the American pastor imprisoned in Iran for his faith, has been released from solitary confinement, "a direct result of the multitudes praying," his wife told the American Center for Law and Justice Thursday.
WISDOM & HUMOR
Quotes
"I believe in Christianity as I believe that the Sun has risen, not only because I see it, but because by it I see everything else." -- C.S. Lewis
Jesus’ Employment Application (by Ron Walters)
Can you imagine if the Savior of the world were asked to fill out a job application? Think of it! After all, His resume is not run-of-the-mill. Put yourself in that employment office. Take a look over His shoulder and follow along as He completes His application. It might look something like this:
NAME: Jesus Christ
APPLICANT BACKGROUND: I am pre-existent, appearing numerous times before my birth. I also participated in the creation.
FAMILY BACKGROUND: Jewish on my mother's side and Divine on my Father's side. Mother was a virgin at the time of my birth.
LIST YOUR REFERENCES: Myriads of myriads and thousands of thousands of angels, and a few fishermen.
CLOSEST RELATIVE: The eternal God, who has said, "This is My beloved Son, in whom I am well pleased."
WHAT DO YOU CONSIDER YOUR GREATEST STRENGTHS? I can forgive sin and raise the dead. From time to time I walk on water.
WHAT IS YOUR EDUCATIONAL BACKGROUND? I taught doctors and elders when I was in Junior High School.
LIST YOUR DUTIES IN PREVIOUS JOBS: I've catered full dinners to large crowds with low overhead. Once, during a wine shortage at a wedding, I improvised with a water substitute. Also, at a local funeral for a friend, I provided the life for the party.
HOW DO YOU GET ALONG WITH OTHERS? It varies. Sometimes they shout "Messiah" to me, and the next day they yell, "Crucify Him."
ARE YOU ABLE TO WORK WEEKENDS? All but one. I have a prior commitment at Mt. Calvary, but I'll return on Sunday.
SALARY REQUIREMENTS: None. Although I haven't a home or even a pillow to lay my head, I do own the universe.
A Misunderstanding
A couple was at the town hall applying for a marriage license. After filling out all the papers, the clerk said, “This license is good for 30 days.” The nervous groom-to-be responded, “No, you don’t understand. We want one that’s till death do us part.”
$10 Til Payday
A beggar approached me the other day and asked, “Can you give me $10 until payday.” I then asked him, “When’s payday?” He replied, “I don’t know. You’re the one that’s working.”
Belated Mother’s Day Thoughts
If They Had a Loving Mother . . .
MONA LISA'S MOTHER: "After all that money your father and I spent on braces, that's the biggest smile you can give us?"
COLUMBUS' MOTHER: "I don't care what you've discovered, you still could have written!"
MICHELANGELO'S MOTHER: "Can't you paint on walls like other children? Do you have any idea how hard it is to get that stuff off the ceiling?"
NAPOLEON'S MOTHER: "All right, if you aren't hiding your report card inside your jacket, take your hand out of there and show me."
ABRAHAM LINCOLN'S MOTHER: "Again with the stovepipe hat? Can't you just wear a baseball cap like the other kids?"
ALBERT EINSTEIN'S MOTHER: "But it's your senior picture. Can't you do something about your hair? Styling gel, mousse, something...?"
GEORGE WASHINGTON'S MOTHER: "The next time I catch you throwing money across the Potomac, you can kiss your allowance good-bye!"
JONAH'S MOTHER: "That's a nice story. Now tell me where you've really been."
THOMAS EDISON'S MOTHER: "Of course I'm proud that you invented the electric light bulb. Now turn it off and get to bed!"
What’s Your Sign?
1) Sign on motorway garage: PLEASE DO NOT SMOKE NEAR OUR PETROL PUMPS. YOUR LIFE MAY NOT BE WORTH MUCH BUT OUR GASOLINE IS.
2) Notice in a field: THE FARMER ALLOWS WALKERS TO CROSS THE FIELD FOR FREE, BUT THE BULL CHARGES
3) Message on a leaflet: IF YOU CANNOT READ, THIS LEAFLET WILL TELL YOU HOW TO GET LESSONS
4) Sign on a repair shop door: WE CAN REPAIR ANYTHING. (PLEASE KNOCK HARD ON THE DOOR - THE BELL DOESN'T WORK)
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MAY 8, 2013
And be not conformed to this world: but be ye transformed by the renewing of your mind, that ye may prove what is that good, and acceptable, and perfect, will of God. (Rom. 12:2)
A man walking into a bank held the door open for the lady behind him. She faced him and said, “You don’t have to hold the door because I’m a woman.” Smiling, he responded, “I’m not holding the door because you’re a woman. I’m holding the door because I’m a gentleman.” As believers we have the Holy Spirit living within us and we don’t react because of some standard of the world. We react because He teaches us God’s standards.
God has us here to demonstrate Him to the world we live in. We are His ambassadors (representatives). We show His love, compassion, etc. And then there are other times when we have to take a stand even when it is not popular.
Don’t allow the world to fit you in their mold. But rather be the person God wants you to be.
Bro. Larry
SUNDAY NEWS
We had two tremendous services on Sunday along with some great study and discussion on chapter 18 of The Story – Daniel in Exile. We continue again this week. As you spend time in chapter 19 allow the Word of God to dwell in your heart and bring to you mind the parts that are applicable to your life.
Don’t forget, I need photos of our graduates as soon as possible for our Graduation Sunday and photos our deceased members and family members that have passed since last year’s Memorial Sunday.
THIS WEEK’S CHURCH CALENDAR
Wednesday
* Adult Study @ 7 p.m.
* Children & Youth Class @ 7 p.m.
Saturday
* Mother’s Tea @ 10:30 a.m.
Sunday
* Prayer Time @ 9:30 a.m.
* Sunday School @ 10 a.m.
* Worship @ 11 a.m.
* Children’s Church @ 11:15 a.m.
* No Evening Service
NEWS WITH A CHRISTIAN PERSPECTIS
NASHVILLE (BP) -- The Middle Tennessee Council of the Boys Scouts of America has voted to affirm Scouting's current national membership policy as "a core value of the Scout Oath and Law." Read more @:
PROVIDENCE, R.I. (BP) -- Rhode Island became the 10th state to legalize gay marriage Thursday (May 2) when its governor signed a bill into law.
WASHINGTON (BP) -- The U.S. Food and Drug Administration has approved the sale of the Plan B One-Step morning-after pill to teens 15 and older without a prescription, a controversial move in part because the drug can cause a chemical abortion.
(Christian Post) Phil Robertson, the patriarch of the Robertson family whose Duck Commander business is the backdrop for A&E's hit program "Duck Dynasty" will release a new book on May 7 titled, Happy, Happy, Happy, in which he shares his faith in Jesus Christ, his knowledge about the founding fathers, and how he's grown Duck Commander into a multimillion dollar business.
The hour-long season finale of Duck Dynasty was the most-watched program on television Wednesday night, beating out American Idol with 9.6 million viewers, which is a record for A&E.
Robertson credits all of his family's success to their faith in Jesus Christ and their devotion to living a Christian lifestyle.
WISDOM & HUMOR
Quotes
Daniel purposed in his heart that he would not defile himself. – Daniel 1:8
Dare to be a Daniel.
If the cops arrest a mute, do they tell him he has the right to remain silent?
Barbecue Season
After 4 long months of cold and winter, we are finally coming up to summer and BBQ season. Therefore it is important to refresh your memory on the etiquette of this sublime outdoor cooking as it's the only type of cooking a
real man will do, probably because there is an element of danger involved.
When a man volunteers to do the Barbecue, usually on a Saturday, the following chain of events are put into motion:
1) The woman buys the food.
2) The woman makes the salad, prepares the vegetables, and makes dessert.
3) The woman prepares the meat for cooking, places it on a tray along with the necessary cooking utensils and sauces, and takes it to the man who is lounging beside the grill - beer in hand.
4) THE MAN PLACES THE MEAT ON THE GRILL.
5) The woman goes inside to organize the plates and cutlery.
6) The woman comes out to tell the man that the meat is burning. He thanks her and asks if she will bring another iced tea while he deals with the situation.
7) THE MAN TAKES THE MEAT OFF THE GRILL AND HANDS IT TO THE WOMAN.
8) The woman prepares the plates, salad, bread, utensils, napkins, sauces and brings them to the table.
9) After eating, the woman clears the table and does the dishes. And most important of all:
10) Everyone PRAISES the MAN and THANKS HIM for his cooking efforts.
11) The man asks the woman how she enjoyed "her night off." And, upon seeing her annoyed reaction, concludes that there's just no pleasing some women....
The Hospital Stay
A man telephoned St Mary's Hospital and asked to speak to Ward E2 as he was enquiring as to the progress of one of the patient's in that ward. She explained that she wanted to know if the patient was getting better, doing as expected or getting worse.
A staff nurse answered the phone, "Hallo, Ward E2. What is the name of the patient and his room number?" "He is in bed 1, room 10, "came the reply, "And his name is Albert Brown."
"Could you hold the line for a moment, "the nurse asked, "While I check his records. Mr. Brown is doing well: blood pressure OK, blood test results appear normal, he's going to be taken off the heart monitor and if he continues to improve then Doctor Svoboda is going to send him home tomorrow at midday."
"Oh, that's super, amazing, I'm so pleased to hear the news; it really is fantastic, thank you so much."
"You sound so glad, "replied the nurse, "You are so and enthusiastic you must be a close friend or a relative of Mr. Brown."
The man answered, "Not exactly, I am Mr. Brown in Ward E2, room 10, bed 1. Nobody in here ever tells me anything."
A Good Medical Joke
While working as a radiology technician in a hospital emergency room, I took some X-rays of a trauma patient and took the results to the senior radiologist, who studied the multiple fractures of the femurs and pelvis.
'What on earth happened to this patient?' he asked in astonishment.
'He fell out of a tree,' according to the report.
The radiologist wanted to know what the patient was doing up a tree.
'I'm not sure, but his paperwork states he works for Mark's Expert Tree Pruning Service.'
Gazing intently at the X-rays, the radiologist blinked and said, 'Cross out 'expert.'
Funny Airline Cabin Crew Announcements
1. On a Southwest flight 245 (SW has no assigned seating, you just sit where you want) passengers were apparently having a hard time choosing, when a flight attendant announced, 'People, people we're not picking out furniture here, find a seat and get in it!'
2. On a Continental Flight with a very 'senior' flight attendant crew, the pilot said, 'Ladies and gentlemen, we've reached cruising altitude and will be turning down the cabin lights. This is for your comfort and to enhance the appearance of your flight attendants.'
3. On landing, the stewardess said, 'Please be sure to take all of your belongings. If you're going to leave anything, please make sure it's something we'd like to have.
4. From a Southwest Airlines employee: 'Welcome aboard Southwest Flight 245 to Tampa . To operate your seat belt, insert the metal tab into the buckle, and pull tight. It works just like every other seat belt; and, if you don't know how to operate one, you probably shouldn't be out in public unsupervised.'
5. 'In the event of a sudden loss of cabin pressure, masks will descend from the ceiling. Stop screaming, grab the mask, and pull it over your face. If you have a small child travelling with you, secure your mask before assisting with theirs. If you are travelling with more than one small child, pick your favorite.'
6. 'Weather at our destination is 50 degrees with some broken clouds, but we'll try to have them fixed before we arrive. Thank you, and remember, nobody loves you, or your money, more than Southwest Airlines.
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MAY 1, 2013
And that, knowing the time, that now it is high time to awake out of sleep: for now is our salvation nearer than when we believed.(Rom. 13:10)
C.S. Lewis spoke to students at Oxford University shortly after England declared war with Germany saying these words, “The impending war has taught us some important things, Life is short. The world is fragile. All of us are vulnerable, but we are here because this is our calling. Our lives are rooted not only in time, but also in eternity, and the life of learning, humility offered to God, is our own reward.”
Lewis stated the attitude all of us Christians should have in unstable times such as today. The truth is that danger has always been and will always be part of a fallen world. Any one of us could meet death at any moment, possibly through an accident, an invisible blood clot, a massive heart attack, the act of a deranged gunman, or as we have seen lately an act of terrorism such as a bombing. Our task is to be faithful in serving God as we wait for the redemption of the body and watching for the return of Jesus Christ.
Be faithful as you are productive in the church where God has planted you to serve Him. Our “end time” could come at any moment. Make the most of your time on earth and you calling of God. Wait, work and watch. These are the three things the Christian is encouraged to be busy doing as we see the return of Jesus on the horizon.
Bro. Larry
SUNDAY NEWS
I rejoice in this past weekend’s activities. The thirty hour famine was a blessing to young and old alike. There was great fellowship, worship services, activities and the kids slept in cardboard boxes surrounded by newspaper to keep the warm. The number of young people participating was 36 and the amount raised for World Vision was $2160.24 which will feed 6 kids for a year, Thank each of you for your support.
Sunday morning’s service was a blessed service we don’t have the privilege of experiencing often enough. To see these young people pouring their heart out on the altar one after another and many unashamedly raising their hands in praise and shedding tears of joy was wonderful. We even had fun with the church breakfast that broke the fast and seeing Heather and Ray with purple hair.
After The Famine
THIS WEEK’S CHURCH CALENDAR
Wednesday
* Adult Study @ 7 p.m.
* Children & Youth Class @ 7 p.m.
Friday
* Senior Adult Outing@ 10:30 a.m.
(Lunch at Top Hog & Fort Bledsoe Colonial Fair)
* Graduating Seniors to Cheesecake Factory @ 5:30 p.m.
Sunday
* Prayer Time @ 9:30 a.m.
* Sunday School @ 10 a.m.
* Worship @ 11 a.m.
* Children’s Church @ 11:15 a.m.
* The Story Small Group Discussion @ 5 p.m.
* Evening Service @ 6 p.m.
* Youth Emphasis @ 6 p.m.
NEWS WITH A CHRISTIAN PERSPECTIS
NASHVILLE (BP) -- A documentary about the impact of "Experiencing God" -- a discipleship study that influenced a generation -- is the first release of LifeWay Films.
"Experiencing God: Knowing and Doing the Will of God" by Henry Blackaby and Claude King has touched and changed millions of lives and thousands of churches worldwide since its release in 1990. The workbook has sold more than 7 million copies, is available in more than 45 languages and has been used in almost every denomination.
WISDOM & HUMOR
Banking Woes
The girl came running in tears to her father. "Dad, you gave me some terrible financial advice!" she cried.
"I did? What did I tell you?" said the dad.
"You told me to put my money in that big bank, and now that big bank is in trouble."
"What are you talking about? That's one of the largest banks in the world," he said. "Surely there must be some mistake."
"I don't think so," she sniffed. "They just returned one of my checks with a note saying, 'Insufficient Funds'."
Chose Your Weapon
Nine-year-old Aaron came home from the playground with a bloody nose, black eye, and torn clothing. It was obvious he'd been in a bad fight and lost. While his father was patching him up, he asked his son what happened.
"Well, Dad," said Aaron, "I challenged Larry to a duel. And, you know, I gave him his choice of weapons."
"Uh-huh," said the father, "that seems fair."
"I know, but I never thought he'd choose his sister!"
Relevancy
The pastor told the search committee, "If I am voted in as pastor of this church, I will work hard to bring us into the 20th century."
Someone spoke up, "Uh, Preacher, don't you mean the 21st century?"
The pastor replied, "Let's take it one century at a time."
What religion are you?
After the Baptism of his baby brother in church, little Denis sobbed all the way home in the back seat of the car. His father asked him three times what was wrong.
Finally, Denis replied, 'That pastor said he wanted us brought up in a Christian home, but I want to stay with you guys.'
Mother-in-law Joke
Harry was travelling down a country road in his native Yorkshire, England when he saw a large group of people outside a farmhouse.
It was a cold January afternoon, so he stopped and asked Farmer Giles why such a large crowd of men was gathered there.
The farmer replied, 'Eddie's donkey kicked his mother-in-law and she died.'
'Well,' replied the man, 'She must have had a lot of friends.'
'Nope,' said Giles.' We all just want to buy his donkey.'
Logical Thinking
A Year 5 teacher was giving her Primary pupils a lesson in developing logical thinking.
"This is the scene," said the teacher.
"A man is standing up in a boat in the middle of a river, fishing. He loses his balance, falls in, and begins splashing and yelling for help.
His wife hears the commotion, knows he can't swim, and runs down to the bank. Why do you think she ran to the bank?"
A little girl raised her hand and asked, "To draw out all his savings?"
Shy Visit To The Dentist
A shy little 4-year-old came in to the dentist for his first cleaning and check-up. After the cleaning, the dentist was called in to do the final check. The dentist tried to strike up a conversation."How old are you?" No response.
The dentist then asked, "Don't you know how old you are?" Immediately four tiny fingers went up.
"Oh," replied the dentist, "and do you know how old that is?"
Four little fingers went up once again.
Continuing the effort to get a response, the dentist asked, "Can you talk?"
The solemn little patient looked at him and asked, "Can you count?
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April 24, 2013
In The Garden
(Weekly devotion for April 24, 2013)
At that day ye shall know that I am in my Father, and ye in me, and I in you. (John 14:21)
“In The Garden” is a beautiful and meaningful hymn written by C, Austin Miles in 1912. After reading from John 20, he got so caught up in the text that it seemed to him he had become a part of the narrative. He sensed himself as a silent witness in the garden experience at the empty tomb. He heard in his mind the words of Jesus as he addressed Mary Magdalene with the simple word, “Mary.”
Miles grabbed a piece of paper and began to write a poem as quickly as the words would come to him and later the same day he wrote the music. The words reveals that a personal relationship with Christ is not only long for but possible.
“And He walks with me, and he talks with me,
And He tells me I am His own;
And the joy we share as we tarry there,
None other has ever known”
The Bible lets us know that Jesus’ presence is with us through the indwelling of the Holy Spirit. Thus, He does walk with us and talk with us along life’s road. And the best part is that He always will. lo, I am with you always, even unto the end of the world. Amen. (Mt. 28:20)
Bro. Larry
SUNDAY NEWS
I appreciate all the good comments concerning Sunday’s sermon. But, I hope you heard the heart and message. You can listen again at the church’s web site of: www.whgbc.org.
The whole day was special even throughout the afternoon and evening as a large number was at church for three hours during the CORE Ministries planning time, the small group discussion, and the evening service. Thanks for your dedication to WHGBC. Our dedication to our church (the local body of Christ) is a direct reflection on our relationship with Christ.
YOUTH 20 HOUR FAMINE
SATURDAY, APRIL 27TH BEGINNING @ 8 A.M.
Things are looking good for the youth participation in this ministry event. The youth are ready and committed to this event. Rain or shine, I pray you will be a part of supporting this ministry event. It could be life changing for your child or another.
THIS WEEK’S CHURCH CALENDAR
Wednesday
* Adult Study @ 7 p.m.
* Children & Youth Class @ 7 p.m.
Friday
* Church is reserved @ 4 p.m.
Saturday
* Youth 30 Hour Famine @ 8 a.m.
Sunday
* Church Breakfast @ 9 a..m.
(to break the youth’s fast. The breakfast is for all. Bring
a breakfast item)
* Sunday School @ 10 a.m.
* Worship @ 11 a.m.
* Children’s Church @ 11:15 a.m.
* The Story Small Group Discussion @ 5 p.m.
* Evening Service @ 6 p.m.
* Youth Emphasis @ 6 p.m.
NEWS WITH A CHRISTIAN PERSPECTIS
IRVING, Texas (BaptistPress) -- Members at the Boy Scouts national convention in May will consider a proposal that would leave in place the prohibition on homosexual Scout leaders but would allow youth who identify as gay to join, it was announced Friday.
NASHVILLE, Tenn. (BaptistPress) -- Another faith-based film marketed by Provident Films has enjoyed a solid opening weekend.
Home Run," which tells the story of a Big League baseball player who falls from the spotlight due to his alcoholism and a DUI, finished No. 3 on a per-theater average, pulling in an estimated $4,260 per theater. Because it opened in only 381 theaters -- as compared to the 3,000 or so theaters reserved for big Hollywood movies -- the per-theater average is closely watched. Its total gross of $1.6 million placed it at No. 12, although every movie above it was playing in at least 1,400 theaters.
Provident was the marketer behind "Fireproof" ($8,148 per-theater on opening weekend) and "Courageous" ($7,849), two films that were box office hits. Provident also marketed "October Baby" ($4,352) and Grace Card ($2,870). Home Run's opening weekend numbers are similar to those of October Baby, which Provident considered an opening weekend success.
WISDOM & HUMOR
""The early bird may get the worm but the second mouse gets the cheese."
"The weakest believer and the strongest saint are alike equally justified. Justification admits no degrees. A man is either wholly justified or wholly condemned in the sight of God."- C.J. Mahaney
When I was a kid you didn't have to say, "Don't try this at home!" because we weren't complete morons back then.
Baptism
The youth director had been trying for months to get the little boy down the street to come to church to be with his third grade Sunday school class.
Finally after talking to the boy and his mother for what seemed to be the hundredth time the boy finally agreed to go this next Sunday, which he did and seemed to enjoy all of the proceedings except as the baptismal service began he ran out the back door and ran all the way home. His mother asked him why he ran home instead of riding with the youth minister.
The little boy answered, "It’s all a racket, They get you there and let you make all those nice things and tell you great stories just to get you relaxed so they can drown you at the end of one of the services.".
Tight Shoes
A man walks into a shoe store, and tries on a pair of 
shoes.
"How do they feel?" asks the sales clerk.
"Well ... they feel a bit tight." replies the man.
The assistant promptly bends down and has a look at the shoes and the man’s feet.
"Try pulling out on the tongue." offers the clerk.
"Nath theyth sthill feelth a bith tighth." He says.
No Place Like Home
While I was dining out with my children, a man came over to our table, and we started talking.
He asked where my kids go to school. I told him we home-schooled them.
With a raised eyebrow, he asked if my husband is the sole breadwinner for our family.
I said, "No, I also work . . out of our home."
Then, noticing our two-month-old son, he mentioned that his daughter had just had a baby, and he wondered what hospital our son was born in.
"He was born at home," I answered.
The man looked at me, then said, "Wow, you don't get out much, do you?"
Tax Assessment Time – Goods vs. Goods
A tax assessor came one day to a poor Christian to determine the amount of taxes he would have to pay.
The following conversation took place:
"What property do you possess?" asked the assessor.
"I am a very wealthy man," replied the Christian.
"List your possessions, please," the assessor instructed.
The Christian said:
"First, I have everlasting life, John 3:16
Second, I have a mansion in heaven, John 14:2
Third, I have peace that passes all understanding, Philippians 4:7
Fourth, I have joy unspeakable, 1 Peter 1:8
Fifth, I have divine love which never fails, 1 Corinthians 13:8
Sixth, I have a faithful pious wife, Proverbs 31:10
Seventh, I have healthy, happy obedient children, Exodus 20:12
Eighth, I have true, loyal friends, Proverbs 18:24
Ninth, I have songs in the night, Psalms 42:8
Tenth, I have a crown of life, James 1:12
The tax assessor closed his book, and said, "Truly you are a very rich man, but your property is not subject to taxation."
I pray that all of us will have this kind of tax free "wealth."
Have a richly blessed day.
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Prayer For Today!
Dear God,
So far today, I've done alright.
I haven't gossiped, and I haven't lost my temper.
I haven't been grumpy, nasty or selfish, and I'm really glad of that!
But in a few minutes, God, I'm going to get out of bed, and from then on, I'm probably going to need a lot of help.
Thank you! Amen
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APRIL 17, 2013
There have been tragedies in our country concerning gun violence and the more we see and hear about on the news, the more our human spirits are becoming numb to the bad news we view. Now, we have experienced another episode of terrorism at the Boston Marathon. Even if our President will not admit this as an act of terrorism, what else can it be? As the news unfold even further, the last results I’ve heard were three bombs that exploded, one that did not. Three or four dead with one of those being an eight year old boy and over a hundred injured, many seriously.
Since the earth shattering events of 9/11, we have consistently viewed acts of violence even though the majority have been outside the borders of our country. As time goes on, I’m afraid events like these will just be common place and we will become numb to the emotional effects of these events.
Not only are we in danger of becoming numb (insensitive) to human catastrophes such as these, we are becoming numb spiritually. First, to the news of God’s Word as we seem no longer challenged or moved by the preaching, teaching, and studying of the Bible. Secondly, we are becoming numb to the sin around us. We become accepting and tolerant of blatant outward sins that our parents and grandparents would not have stood for.
Sin, is similar. Sometimes it’s cute and you would like to play around with it. After all, much of the time sin appears harmless. But there comes a time when sin releases it ill effects on you. God is forgiving as stated in 1 John 1:9, “If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins, and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.” But there is no guarantee that the circumstances of sin will not linger on for some time to follow. It’s like my mother always told me, “If you play with fire you are going to get burned.” Those words are
still true today.
The answer to stopping the spread of this numbness and insensitivity lies within the human heart. Only God can change the human heart. But first, put your heart into His hands and yield to Him as clay in the hands of the potter.
Bro. Larry
SUNDAY NEWS
Good services this weekend. Many of our ladies were gone to the Women of Joy Conference but attendance was not as good as it has been but still good. Thank especially to those who were present Sunday evening. It seemed unusual to have over 50 stay for a quarterly business meeting.
YOUTH 20 HOUR FAMINE
SATURDAY, APIL 27TH BEGINNING @ 8 A.M.
Things are looking good for the youth participation in this ministry event. However, I’m afraid we adults are letting them down. Please fill out the forms and be involved.
THIS WEEK’S CHURCH CALENDAR
Wednesday
* Adult Study @ 7 p.m.
* Children & Youth Class @ 7 p.m.
Friday
* Senior Adult Outing to Patti’s in Grand River, Kentucky – leaving @ 9”30 a.m. (everyone is invited)
Saturday
* Men’s Breakfast @ 8 a.m.
* Camp Forshee Work Day @ 9 a.m.
* W.O.W. Ladies’ Luncheon @ 11:30 a.m.
(Anita Doss’s home, 1130 Woodvale Dr., Gallatin)
* Church Reserved for the afternoon @ 1 p.m.
Sunday
* Prayer Time @ 9:30 a.m.
* Sunday School @ 10 a.m.
* Worship @ 11 a.m.
* Children’s Church @ 11:15 a.m.
* CORE Ministry Meeting @ 4 p.m.
* The Story Small Group Discussion @ 5 p.m.
* Evening Service @ 6 p.m.
* Youth Emphasis @ 6 p.m.
Tuesday
* C.T.I. Graduation (Cornerstone in Gallatin) @ 7 p.m.
NEWS WITH A CHRISTIAN PERSPECTIS
BOSTON—Law enforcement officials cautioned that they are just beginning the potentially lengthy process of tracking down the culprit behind two bombs that left more than 170 people injured and three dead near the finish line of the Boston Marathon Monday. Seventeen of the injured are in critical condition in area hospitals, officials said Tuesday, with several of them facing amputations.
Officials have not said anything publicly about the nature of the bombs, but doctors treating the injured said Tuesday that it appeared the bombs were loaded with metal bearings that embedded into the skin of their patients. The AP reported--citing anonymous law enforcement sources--that the bombs were made of six-liter pressure cookers stuffed with ball bearings and placed in duffel bags.
WISDOM & HUMOR
"Rationality is seldom the partner of deception." - Justice Christopher Grauer
"Prayer is not overcoming God's reluctance, but laying hold of His willingness." - Martin Luther
Future Occupation
Concerned about her son’s future, a man decided to test the youngster. He put the lad in a room with only a Bible, an apple, and a five-dollar bill. If the boy sat down and read the Bible, he was destined to a career in ministry. If you boy ate the apple, he would be a farmer. The boy most likely would become a banker if he took the money.
The boy was brought in. Sitting on the Bible, he chewed on the apple and put the five dollar bill in his pocket. The man smiled and said, I guess my son will be a politician.
Interstate 65
As a senior citizen was driving down the interstate his car phone rang. Answering, he heard his wife warning him in a frantic voice, “I just heard there is a car going the wrong way on the interstate. Please be careful.”
Honey, it just one car, it’s hundreds of them.
Choose Your Weapon
Nine-year-old Aaron came home from the playground with a bloody nose, black eye, and torn clothing.
It was obvious he'd been in a bad fight and lost.
While his father was patching him up, he asked his son what happened.
"Well, Dad," said Aaron, "I challenged Bobby to a duel. And, you know, I gave him his choice of weapons."
"Uh-huh," said the father, "that seems fair."
"I know, but I never thought he'd choose his sister!".
The Pastor Takes Bathtub Test for Mental Health
During a visit to the mental asylum, Bro. Larry asked the Director what the criterion was which defined whether or not a patient should be institutionalized.
'Well,' said the Director, 'we fill up a bathtub, then we offer a teaspoon, a teacup, and a bucket to the patient and ask him or her to empty the bathtub.'
'Oh, I understand,' said Larry. 'A normal person would use the bucket because it's bigger than the spoon or teacup.
'No.' said the Director, 'A normal person would pull the plug. (Pause) Bro. Larry do you want a bed near the window?'
Running The Red Lights
Two elderly ladies were driving to services at White House General Baptist Church. When the passenger got scared and informed the driver, “Mildred, you have ran three red lights in a row! You could have killed us both!”
Mildred, turned to her and said, “Oh, I’m sorry. Am I driving?”
Proverbs – Fill In The Blanks According to 6year olds
No news is............................ impossible.
An idle mind is....................... the best way to relax.
Strike while the...................... bug is close.
A penny saved is...................... not much.
A miss is as good as a ............... Mr.
Happy is the bride who................ gets all the presents.
Two's company, three's................ the Musketeers.
Don't bite the hand that.............. looks dirty.
It's always darkest before............ Daylight Saving Time.
There are none so blind as ........... Stevie Wonder.
If at first you don't succeed......... get new batteries.
When the blind lead the blind ........ get out of the way!
Children should be seen and not .. spanked or grounded.
You can't teach an old dog new ....... math.
Don't put off till tomorrow what.... you put on to go to bed.
Academics & Football
A football coach walked into the changing room before a game. He looked over to his new signing and said, "I'm not supposed to let you play since you failed arithmetic, but we need you to be in the team. So, what I have to do is ask you a math question, and if you get it right then you will be allowed to play."
The player agreed, so coach looked into his eyes intently and asked, "Okay, now concentrate hard and tell me the answer to this. What is two plus two?"
The player thought for a moment and then answered, "4?"
"Did you say 4?" the coach exclaimed, excited that he had got it correct.
Suddenly all the other players on the team began shouting..., "Come on coach, give him another chance!"
************************
April 10, 2013
Run Away Christians
(Weekly devotion for April 10, 2013)
Submit yourselves therefore to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you. (James 4:7)
Mrs. Monroe lives in Darlington, Maryland. She’s the mother of 8 children. As expected, a mother of 8 would have many unique experiences. She came home one afternoon from the grocery store and walked into her home and everything looked pretty much the same, though it was a little bit quieter than usual. She looked into the middle of the living room and 5 of her darlings were sitting around in a circle, exceedingly quiet, doing something, with something in the middle of a circle. So she put down the sacks of groceries and walked over closely and looked and saw that they were playing with 5
of the cutest skunks you can imagine.
She was instantly terrified and she said, “Run children, run! Each child grabbed a skunk and ran, in 5 different directions. She was beside herself and screamed louder, more frantically, with great gusto. It so scared the children that each one squeezed his skunk! As the storyteller said, “Skunks don’t like to be squeezed!” I’m sure the effects of the children’s activity lingered for some time.
Sin, is similar. Sometimes it’s cute and you would like to play around with it. After all, much of the time sin appears harmless. But there comes a time when sin releases it ill effects on you. God is forgiving as stated in 1 John 1:9, “If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins, and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.” But there is no guarantee that the circumstances of sin will not linger on for some time to follow. It’s like my mother always told me, “If you play with fire you are going to get burned.” Those words are
still true today.
Bro. Larry
SUNDAY NEWS
The attendance definitely dropped off from the previous Sunday - - - Easter. We still had a good attendance and good services.
I appreciate those who assisted me in providing your response to The Story that I will use in the workshop in Saturday. I know there are some of you who always come through for me. If you have not turned your paragraph in, please do so tonight or email it today.
THIS WEEK’S CHURCH CALENDAR
Wednesday
* Adult Study @ 7 p.m.
* Children & Youth Class @ 7 p.m.
Friday
* Ladies leave for the Women of Joy Conference @ 7 a.m.
Saturday
* Association Sunday School Convention @ 9 a.m.
(Providence Church in Westmoreland)
Sunday
* Prayer Time @ 9:30 a.m.
* Sunday School @ 10 a.m.
* Worship @ 11 a.m.
* Children’s Church @ 11:15 a.m.
* The Story Small Group Discussion @ 5 p.m.
* Evening Service @ 6 p.m.
* Youth Emphasis @ 6 p.m.
* Quarterly Business Meeting @ 7 p.m.
NEWS WITH A CHRISTIAN PERSPECTIS
NASHVILLE (BP) -- The suicide of Matthew Warren continues to reverberate not only in Christian circles but the culture which his parents, Rick and Kay Warren, have sought to impact since the founding of Saddleback Church in 1980.
Matthew Warren, 27, died Friday morning, April 5, at his home in Mission Viejo, Calif.
Warren released an emotional statement to Saddleback's staff after the suicide. The statement has since been broadly published:
"Over the past 33 years we've been together through every kind of crisis. Kay and I've been privileged to hold your hands as you faced a crisis or loss, stand with you at gravesides, and prayed for you when ill. Today, we need your prayer for us.
"No words can express the anguished grief we feel right now. Our youngest son, Matthew, age 27, and a lifelong member of Saddleback, died today.
"But only those closest knew that he struggled from birth with mental illness, dark holes of depression, and even suicidal thoughts. In spite of America's best doctors, meds, counselors, and prayers for healing, the torture of mental illness never subsided. Today, after a fun evening together with Kay and me, in a momentary wave of despair at his home, he took his life.
WISDOM & HUMOR
What comes into our minds when we think about God, is the most important thing about us. - A.W. Tozer
"Men do not differ much about what things they will call evils; they differ enormously about what evils they will call excusable." - G.K. Chesterton
Logical Thoughts …
1.My mechanic told me, "I couldn't repair your brakes, so I made your horn louder.
2.If nothing ever sticks to TEFLON, how do they make TEFLON stick to the pan?
3.Why are there flotation devices under plane seats instead of parachutes?
4.Why do they call it a TV set when you only get one?
5.What was the best thing before sliced bread?
A Country Boy Reasoning It All Out.
Old Jeb is the laziest man in the county. One day his best friend drove by his farm and noticed his barn was on fire. "Your barn's burning down," he yelled.
"I know it," replied Jeb.
"Well, ain't ya gonna do somethin'?" asked the friend.
"Do somethin'?" responded Jeb. "'Bout what?"
"Why about puttin' out the fire, ya fool." answered the friend.
"I am doin' somethin'." replied Jeb.
"What the heck are you doin', jist sittin' there 'n all?" asked Jeb's friend.
"I ain't jist sittin'," replied Jeb, "I'm sittin' here prayin' for rain."
Answers given in a Bible knowledge test
1. The first book of the Bible is Guinness's, In the book of Guinness.
2. Adam and Eve were created from an apple tree. Noah's wife was Joan of the Ark. Noah built the ark and the animals came on in pears.
3. The first commandments was when Eve told Adam to eat the apple.
4. The seventh commandment is thou shalt not admit adultery.
5.Lot's wife was a pillar of salt by day and a ball of fire by night.
6. Samson slayed the Philistines with the axe of the apostles.
7. Solomon had 100 wives and 700 porcupines.
Stop or Slow Down
One night Rodney was driving home along a road he knew well. When he reached the Stop sign he slowed down but did not actually come to a halt, whereupon a police officer pulled Rodney's car over.
'What difference does it make' said Rodney, 'slow down or stop'.
'I will give you a demonstration' said the officer and starting beating Rodney with his truncheon. 'Now would you like me to slow down - or stop?
Drive on
A group of pensioners were discussing their medical problems at the Day Centre coffee morning.
'Do you realize,' said one, 'My arm is so weak I can hardly hold this coffee cup.'
'Yes, I know.' replied the second, 'My cataracts are so bad I can't see to pour the coffee.'
'I can't turn my head,' rejoined the third, 'because of the arthritis in my neck.'
'My blood pressure pills make my dizzy,' commented the fourth, adding, 'I guess that's the price we pay for getting old.'
'Well, it's not all bad.' piped up the first, 'We should be thankful that we can still drive.'
Excuse Me Driver
A guy in a taxi wanted to speak to the driver so he leaned forward and tapped him on the shoulder.
The driver screamed, jumped up in the air and yanked the wheel over. The car mounted the curb, demolished a lamppost and came to a stop inches from a shop window.
The startled passenger said, "I didn't mean to frighten you, I just wanted to ask you something."
The Taxi driver said, "It's not your fault sir. It's my first day as a cab driver. I've been driving a hearse for the past 25 years!"
